Likes

I feel like Sally Fields … “you like me, you really like me.” Yesterday was the first day my blog posts were visible on Facebook and I got some Likes. How cool is that! It feels great to be liked!

I was definitely more like my Daddy growing up and actually until very recently. I was more of a listener than a talker. Oh, I spoke, but I didn’t share things about myself very often or with a lot of people. Doing one of those ice-breaker things that so many training classes start with was almost torture for me. For days leading up to the training, I would be trying to anticipate what personal information I would have to share so that I could be ready with something that made me seem interesting. However, in the last couple of years I seem to be turning more into my Mama. I’m turning into a talker and a sharer.

I have a theory about that. I finally started listening to what my mama had been telling me for years. It is my life and if I do or say something that someone else doesn’t like then too-bad-so-sad (as my sister Katie says).

Mama and I loved each other with all our hearts and souls. In fact, as much as Jerry, Judy, and Katie believe otherwise, I really was her favorite!! But mama and I didn’t like each other all the time. I guess that is true for most mothers and daughters.

I was the oldest …just like her. I (thought I) had to be perfect … just like her. Guess what? It ain’t possible to be perfect. She wasn’t and I certainly am not! But I tried my best as I fully believe she did (as the first and only) for her parents. And I think because I was not able to meet those high standards that I set for myself, it was easier to keep things inside rather than let them out and risk upsets.

A few years ago, Mama started verbalizing what, I’m sure, she was trying to get across subtly for years – it is my life and if I do or say something that someone else doesn’t like then that is their problem, not mine. It is strange that she didn’t say it to me earlier because anyone that knew my mom knows there was nothing subtle about her!! Maybe I was so caught up in myself, I just didn’t hear her.

Now I would give anything to be able to tell her some of the things that I kept inside all those years. She would laugh like crazy at some of them; tell me how nuts I was for others. But she would rejoice that I was FINALLY sharing my life with her. I know that she would be clicking that Facebook Like button for me too.

I miss you, Mama. I will love you always. And, oh yeah, I really like you too!

MamaSmile

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